What's your strategy for finding love and happiness?

Dec 28, 2022

When it comes to the important things in life, do you tend to research and strategize or do you simply leave it up to chance and hope for the best? 

When making a large financial investment, would you merely hand over your hard earned cash without doing your due diligence, trusting that somehow it would all work out?  

If you were entering into a marathon, but the most exercise you had done in the last 10 years was an occasional gentle stroll, would you just turn up on the day and trust that all would be well?

Would you leave your children's schooling and their whole education to chance and simply send them to the nearest, most convenient school, without doing your due diligence?

Would you just "trust to luck" in any of those scenarios??

I'm guessing No!

Why? Because you know that your endeavour would likely end in disaster if you just 'chanced’ it. 

Making the effort to research and strategize might seem obvious with such high stakes activities as financial investment, competing in a race or your children’s education, but when it comes to dating in midlife and attracting an amazing life partner, it’s often another story altogether…

As a love and dating coach who specialises in helping women in midlife to easily and gracefully re-enter and navigate the modern dating world, it never ceases to amaze me when I hear women say things like, “Oh, I don’t need to worry about any of that, Mr Right will come along when I’m least expecting him,” or, “modern dating is too confusing so there’s no point, I’m just going to wait until Mr Right just appears into my life”.

Why do we believe in this sort of magical thinking when it comes to finding love, soulmate love? The dating process is like all the other important processes in your life: so why is DATING the one thing that so many women of a certain age are willing to just ‘trust to luck’ to? 

Here’s what inevitably ends up happening when you simply trust to luck:

-You end up waiting forever or

-You end up getting hurt or treated badly when you choose the wrong person

-You end up believing that there's something fundamentally wrong with you so..

-You end up settling for what you can get

and so on...

It's no wonder that so many women end up suffering as they go through this process (and why even more fear putting themselves back out there again...)

So WHAT can you do differently?

I invite you to ask yourself these questions for starters:

-Have you thought about what you really want in a relationship?

-Can you articulate this without reeling off a long laundry list?

-Have you worked on your own self-worth and self-love?

-Have you handled your baggage? 

-Are your walls still up? 

-Have you considered what energy you’re projecting?

-Do you have a strategy, a solid plan for getting yourself back out there? 

-Do you feel ready to do this? 

If the answer is YES to all of these questions: Great job! And keep doing what you're doing!

If the answer is NO: Reach out to me - I'd love to help you! 🥰